Your partner left you for a soulmate?
Your child is suffering from mental illness?
You're 55 and no one will give you an interview?
You lost your life savings in the mortgage crisis?
Your 401K won't support your retirement?
You have breast cancer?
Change your Flippin' Attitude for crimenies sakes and quit yer bellyaching! You brought it on yourself. Which means in a narcissistic society: society is not culpable. You Are! Yes, YOU! And while you are dealing with your crisis, put a damn smile on your face, will ya? You have a rotten attitude for someone learning a lesson you didn't learn when you shoulda.
It is cruel to tell people all they have to do is change their attitude. It is cruel to tell people they ‘attracted’ abuse into their lives. That they wanted to be hurt. It is cruel to tell people that the narcissist was teaching them a lesson and once they learned that lesson, they’d achieve some kind of nirvanic enlightenment.
“It’s all in your head…just change your attitude.”
As Barbara Ehrenreich also says, "Believing everything is doomed to failure is delusional, too." She is not advocating depression, negativity, misery, and gloom. Her radical suggestion is embracing Realism by seeing what is actually happening in the world and figuring out what we can do to resolve 'Real' problems. Yup. That means all of us.
Full Version, if you have time or interest enough to watch it: 35 minutes duration
You may also be interested in this one-hour lecture even better than the above:
An Evening with Barbara Ehrenreich
Hugs,
CZ
An Evening with Barbara Ehrenreich
Hugs,
CZ
I have a very similar conviction about all this hoo-haw, CZ! I just wrote a post about it:
ReplyDeletehttp://upsi-upsi.blogspot.com/2011/09/power-and-control.html
Thanks for being a voice of reason!
xo
upsi
Thumbs up!
ReplyDeleteLiselotte
Hi Upsi!
ReplyDeleteI appreciate the link since I can't keep up with blogs the way I'd like. I look forward to snow covering the gardens and a good excuse to spend hours on the computer.
I particularly dislike "The Secret" AND the Law of Attraction or anyone 'channeling' wisdom for the less-enlightened masses. It's not a popular opinion today and if I do express my concerns, people try to 'explain' the law of attraction to me. *insert rolling eyes here*
I "get" the overall gist of the thing---positive attitudes are more attractive than being a sour puss. If you always SEE bad stuff, you'll miss seeing the good things in your life. BUT we have taken this idea to a ridiculous extreme and God Bless Barbara Ehrenreich for having the verbal skills, the resources, and the guts to shine a light on the Dark Side of the Bright Side.
Hugs to you,
CZ
Hi Liselotte!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all: Nice to hear from you on my blog! Thanks for posting and letting me know you're still reading.
Though Ehrenreich is considered to be 'political' and therefore 'controversial', the woman is not some crackpot from podunk nowhere. She is a brilliant scientist, a fearless journalist, a reliable social researcher. In other words, she's not all words without substance which is saying a lot in today's pseudo-journalist world.
I hope people will listen to what she has to say without getting defensive about her political beliefs.
She has also written an excellent book called "Nickled and Dimed" which is used in University classes.
Glad you enjoyed the video(s).
Hugs,
CZ
I agree. Reality is sometimes different from what we think or feel.
ReplyDeleteThanks. The N who was in my life (notice past tense) was big on book The Secret. I don't believe you can will the sh(t in your life away. But, I do believe that a positive attitude, and even more importantly, a sense of humor, can see you through some tough times.
ReplyDeleteA friend send me this today in regards to Steve Jobs' death:
"Steve Jobs was born out of wedlock, put up for adoption at birth, dropped out of college then changed the world. What's your excuse?"
Hi CZ....I love Barbara Ehrenreich, read her years ago, and can't remember her particular politic, but hell....mine have changed over the years.
ReplyDeleteThe two things that drive me to violence are these words:
1) "Get over it" (applied to YOU about the Narcissist's behavior)
2) "Change your attitude...the world will look better."
Sorry, most of that means this: You are making others uncomfortable by your realizations about Narcissism...perhaps even pricking their own bubbles?
Self-realization takes time and effort...and time. There is no way around this.
I'll go to that video in a few minutes.
Thanks, CZ...always for shining a light on what needs revealing.
Peace.
Lady Nyo