October 09, 2012

About our Message Board



Dear all,

Now's a really good time to take a bubble bath, to read a book, to catch up on all those research articles you've been meaning to read. You'll even have time to ride your bicycle, or go jogging, and you might even have time to take a trip around the world. jest kiddin

Maybe not.

Our message board went down and it may have been hacked or it may be a problem with the code but whatever the issue is, we won't be up and running anytime soon. Like not in an hour, or a day, or even a week.

Nobody did anything wrong and even though there have been some heated debates lately, nothing any one said got us kicked off the Internet. I want to calm everyone's fears about memberships being revoked.

If you want to talk with someone right now because you are in a vulnerable place, post a comment and I'll reply as soon as I can. 

Hugs everyone......

CZ

p.s. I will continue updating this message until the problems are resolved. Please cross your fingers and if you have any extra prayers to share, we could use a few of those.








41 comments:

  1. Hello,
    My computer is acting like its been hacked, too. A bubble bath is certainly in order! I've tried to send this message a couple of times with no luck. Hope my message finds you and yours safe and well.

    Love,
    Judy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Judy!

      Quite a few people have told me their comments won't go through on my blog! We take the Internet for granted, don't we? I don't even think about how amazing it is to boot up the computer and talk with people---until the website doesn't work.

      What a shock that was yesterday: Account Suspended. Then I go to my email and it says "Reason For Suspending Account: Abuse."

      Well, I nearly had a panic attack! I abused a server in Texas?!??!! ha!

      We haven't resolved all of the problems with our website but the challenge right now is reducing the traffic. Yea, I know...that's the kind of problem website owners would give their eye teeth to have, isn't it?

      It will take another day, at least. Bless my son's heart...he's been working on this problem ever since the site went down yesterday.

      Hope my reply finds you and yours safe and well, too.

      Love,
      CZ

      Delete
    2. Reducing the traffic? This warms my heart in a bittersweet kind of way. The "bitter" part is that there is no WoN on the internet. The "sweet" part is that WoN lies in the hearts and souls of women - not in a machine. WoN's energy lives on and will wait for the "equipment" to be fixed. Do you see the fairies perched on your keyboard patiently waiting? They may start making crisis visits to those in need -not sure. Ask JR...I'll bet he'll tell you he's been dusted!

      Thank you JR for attempting to fix and restore our beautiful WoN. No tech knowledge or advice here - only praise, admiration and a heart full of warmth can I send your way.

      Love to CZ and JR from PJ.

      Delete
  2. Hi CZ, Just want to send best wishes to you and huge thanks to your son for working on the problem. The link from the 'maintenance' page to the blog didn't actually work for me, I had to type in the URL of the blog itself to get here. I won't try to access WoN now until you give the go-ahead.
    Hugs,
    Never

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Never!

      Oh, don't worry! Our legitimate users are not crashing the website, even if you stay logged-in 24/7 reading archives.

      The issues are "spider bots"---search engine 'robots' that crawl websites creating links. Some of them are well-behaved when you tell them they aren't welcome; and some aren't. Until we get them to leave our website alone, we cannot put it back on the Internet.

      We may also be dealing with other problems more serious than 'bots'. We'll see...so far, the problem ain't fixed.

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
  3. Miss ya'all!! Thank you, Son-of-CZ, for working to get us back up and messaging. :D

    ~Alatariel

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    Replies

    1. Hi Alatariel!

      We didn't pass our 'go' test today. It'll be at least one more day. :(

      Missin' y'all, too.


      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
  4. And I thought I did it again. LOL.

    Thank you both for working so tirelessly to get the site back to being the safe haven it is for us.

    Hugs,

    RB

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    Replies
    1. Hi RB! We've been talking to each other at least once a week for years now...so what a weird thing it is not hearing from you, or seeing your screenname, or eavesdropping on your conversations with other people.

      Losing WoN is kinda like losing your local Starbucks. I'm feeling the loss, too---believe me!

      My son is having to go into the gobbledy-gook code now and I can't even make sense of what he tells me he's doing. If it weren't for him, we'd all be sunk at this point. It's not just the 'bots', its something more critical than that.

      He's doing all the work though--not me. I just ask stupid questions and wait for the geek-groan. Which never comes 'cuz he's a nice guy and only groans when his Mom is out of hearing distance.

      Thanks for your cheerleading...appreciation goes a long way. I'll let him know.

      Thanks,
      CZ

      Delete
  5. Hi CZ and ala! I miss you guys and all the other members on WoN! I've been so bored I had to do some housecleaning! This can't go on forever!!! My hands smell like bleach, the diswasher is emptied, dust bunnies are gone. Hubby is going to think he's in the wrong house! :)

    Thank you son-of-CZ for your hard work.

    Hugs, milkthistle

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. Well, thank you, Milkthistle!

      When you've finished spit-polishing your house, would you mind dropping by mine? I haven't' cleaned it since 2005 when WoN first hit the Internet. It's been seven years and you know what they say about the Seven Year Glitch, right?

      ha...bad joke. sorry. ;P We could use some cheer around this place, though.

      NO dustbunnies? Wow. You're tough. I can't believe you got rid of the family's pets! ha!

      Thanks for dropping by!

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
    2. I may have to follow milkthistle's lead if WoN isn't up and running soon.

      A clean house of course will be attributed to someone else... LOL.

      Ok... going to wash the kitchen floor.....

      Miss everyone...

      Hugs,

      Delete
  6. Oh, dear. I miss you all so much! The good thing is that I found you when I did. A month later and who knows? I might have never. Can't wait till we are up again, until then...I'm trying my level best to stay clear of the Ns.

    Much love to you all, and good luck, CZ.

    Writethinkspeak

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Writethinkspeak,

      Your name reminds me how some of us do life backwards. We speak, write and then think. And it gets us in trouble. Or we leave out the last part completely. The thinking part. ha!

      I always wonder, because there's surely a story to tell, how people find our little island in the vast cybersea.

      Thanks for the good luck wishes! I'm really glad you found us, too.

      <3
      CZ

      Delete
  7. Hi CZ, Hi Guys, I am Bruna, thought I had lost my password to log in here...haha. Well I have lost my password but i don't think that is the problem why WoN does not work! (or is it?)
    Well miss you all!!!!
    See you soon I hope
    Bruna

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. Hello dear Bruna! Passwords aren't the problem. Don't worry! Our forum is not operable at this point in time though we're doing our best to get things in order so they'll let us back on the Internet. ha!

      We have technical problems---and that's that and since my son works a full-time job, we just have to be patient while he resolves the problems. It's for darn sure his Mom can't do that!!

      When the forum is open again, I'll post another message on my blog. If you can't remember the name of my blog and the url link on our site doesn't work, google my name: CZBZ and you'll find me!

      Hugs!
      CZ

      Delete
  8. Eek! I saw BOTH of my XN's in town yesterday, within 5 minutes! They each nodded vaguely in my direction, and I returned the nod and kept going. They both look terrible, IMO worse than I do. I can always lose a few lbs, but they can't lose ugly... ;-P Seriously, he looked fat, florid and unhealthy, and she looked pinched, drawn and mean.

    If those are the faces they show the world, how in Earth was I ever attracted to either of them? O_o

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ha! Your story made me laugh, Ala!

      What I wish for each person suffering the demise of an inevitably tragic relationship, is to write a message like you just did. To look at narcissists and see them for who and what they are---not what our imaginations build them up to be!

      Not to imply by any stretch that 'we' build them up and they have nothing to do with that. Narcissists, as everybody here knows, are masters of disguise. We believe they are incredibly wonderful people because they pretend to be incredibly wonderful people.

      I do get sick and tired of being accused of seeing what I wanted to see and no wonder my marriage failed....boooooo! People who say that, have no idea what they're talking about. And even though it fires up my ire, I still wouldn't wish a narcissistic-relationship on anyone. It can break people.

      Thanks for writing this morning. I'm missing your daily posts!

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
  9. Hi ala! When you met them they were turning on their charm. Now they are just husks of humanity looking for someone to suck dry.

    Good for you for giving the nod and moving on, AND both in one day! (and while WoN is down) So that's a triple victory for you!

    Hugs, milkthystle

    P.S. Hi everybody!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. Hi Milkthystle! Gosh it's nice to hear from people!

      CZ
      <3

      p.s. I love that little heart symbol taught to me by none other than my son. I was like, "What's less than three, dude? Can't ya finish your equation or at least give your mom a clue?!!!"

      Delete
  10. Ugghhh...so, here I am in my sister's house (as I've told you all before) and my dad is here in hospice, and on his deathbed, truly, and my N-sister (one of them, anyway) keeps saying, "I'm gonna miss MY dad" and "In this photo MY dad is sitting right next to ME" and "My daughter is really close to HER grandfather" (this in front of my daughter, obviously also his granddaughter, and about the same age...but then she says, "Oh, I'm really glad you're here, WTS, because..I couldn't do all of this without you. You're such a help" (of course she couldn't) and nothing about feelings or love or connection (because, duh, she's a narcissist)...and I stop being mad, and instead remember the narcissistic family system in which I was raised, and instead of "Arggghhhh!" I just say "Uh-huh....yeah...right."

    What a weird year. I miss the forum! We'll all have so much to say when we're back, won't we? Love to you all...

    Writethinkspeak

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gosh WTS...your feelings and your grief is overshadowed by your sister's self-centered focus. That would be hurtful to anyone, being replaced by "MY" father and "MY" grandfather as if you didn't exist. Her use of pronouns is jarring...but as you've written---she's narcissistic.

      She isn't feeling closer to you because you are there with her, instead, she is focused on her relationship with your father. And, in a way, minimizing your sadness in comparison to HERS.

      Taking note of the 'narcissistic family system' cuts the confusion. It also helps us "observe" the situation instead of reacting. Remaining as neutral as possible (while collecting date for your Narcissism File) takes maturity, WTS.

      If you can model healthy behavior for all the children involved, my bet is that your niece will want to talk with you one day. Remaining sane in a sea of crazy is the best thing we can do for our children. so many parents have said that learning about Narcissism and our reactions to Narcissists, helped them be better parents and that is the point really, isn't it?

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
    2. Didn't see this somehow, yesterday..thanks for the support, CZ. Are we really likely to be up SUnday? I've been meaning to tell you that I look at people's writing all day long when I'm doing writing center/editing work, and I truly appreciate good writing when I see it. I never fail to enjoy your wonderful use of language and your deep and accurate analysis. Love it!

      Delete
  11. A shoutout to everyone, I miss you guys! Am sure I'll get more work done on my thesis tomorrow though ;).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Anna! We're making headway on repairing the problems. You only have a couple more days to get that thesis finished before we're sipping tea and eating crumpets next to the fireplace again. *wink*

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
  12. I miss you guys! I agree with OrphanAnna....I'm sure getting a lot more homework done.

    Thanks CZ and CZ's son for being so diligent and reliable.

    I'm only just beginning to realize how much I count on WON to be there. :-)

    Proud2B

    (BTW, CZ, when I click on the link to your blog on the temporary WON forum home page, I get an error. I know it used to work, but then it didn't. I finally found you again by doing a BLOG search).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's nice to know y'all are so productive. I've had a couple of Stare Sessions gazing at my monitor...HUH???DUH???!!! WHAT THE #*!@**##!!!

      Several people have mentioned the direct link problem, Proud. No idea why people get an 'error message'. Some of the people being redirected to my blog, can't get their comments to post, either. Then they email me which is saying something since they're relying on their memory for my address.

      My email address was listed openly on my sidebar and then I got an in-tray full of 'extender ads' and I ain't referring to hairstyles.

      SO IF ANYONE needs to Contact Me via email: click on the 'Terms of Use' page on my sidebar and scroll to the bottom of the page for my address.

      It's so nice being missed, Proud. I miss you, too. You've been contributing to WoN for many years, even before we moved into the castle! Remember our first home in the barnyard? I kinda miss our chocolate brown forum with roaming cows, wolves in sheep's clothing, and dogs learning new tricks. ha!

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
  13. I really have too much time on my hands now that WoN is down. I've cleaned the house and washed the stinkiest of my dogs. All the dogs and cat have been groomed to within an inch of their lives. Tomorrow I will be forced to henna my hair and maybe wash another dog. Then what? Go to the library? Laundry? Bake a pumpkin pie?

    Hi everyone! Miss you all <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You could groom my cat if you're bored! You can't do anything for Milkthystle's bunnies, though. She got rid of 'em. ;P

      We're cleaning out the kitchen pantry, checking expiration dates on canned goods, finding room for newly bottled tomatoes and salsa. I've been meaning to get that done for a couple of weeks and now there's NO excuse.

      When the drawbridge is lowered again, we should start a thread about what we accomplished when the castle was under siege. ha!

      <3
      CZ

      Delete
  14. Speaking of having time to do things, the board couldn't have gone down at a better time, since I have all kinds of work to catch up on, and had to prepare a PowerPoint for a monthly meeting last night. So, the board went down b/c I wanted it to, so I could increase my productivity. I know my needs definitely trump those of the rest of you puny mortals.

    :-P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So YOU're the culprit, eh? Your negative thoughts brought the entire website down just to meet YOUR needs! If I'd known you were that powerful, Ala, we'd have asked you to "Think Fix" and save us a whole lotta trubble! ha!

      We passed another crucial test last night (whew!) and it looks like (crossing my fingers) we'll be back online by Sunday. I think the forum's sidebar information got lost in the repair (waaaah!) and that'll take some time recreating but everyone's posts remain as is...in case people were concerned.

      How'd your PowerPoint meeting go? ;)

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete
  15. CZ!! That's great news! Meanwhile, tomorrow is my birthday and I got a $900 translation job (English into SPanish) that I can do in 1 day - $900 closer to freedom, what a lovely job to do on my birthday! A real gift! So...after I'm done, it'll be a treat to have WoN back again...the thought will spur me along....Well now, kids to bed, translation to begin, but first...I think I'll read an article off the blog, there are so many yet to explore...

    love to you all,
    Writethinkspeak

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's fantastic news, WTS, and Happy Birthday!!

      Delete
    2. Thanks, Ala!

      WTS

      Delete
  16. I think I know why the link on the temporary WON page won't connect to this page. When you hover over the link, it looks like this:

    http://www.webofnarcissism.com/%22http://www.n-continuum.blogspot.com/%22

    when I think it should simply look like this:

    http://www.n-continuum.blogspot.com

    Good luck! I miss the site.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Sunday, We'll by up by Sunday!!!! I better get to work getting things done.. all I have been doing is watching a sick baby sleep.

    Doing the happy dance, in my dirty house.

    RB

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sick baby? :( It's awful when babies are sick, they can't tell us what's wrong so we can help them. I hope she feels better soon!

      Delete
    2. Kisses and hugs to sick baby! Bless her heart and her caretakers, too!

      p.s. I posted a comment to WriteThinkSpeak below and you can log in to the forum now. We're still working on some of the glitches that occurred during our shut down. See you soon!

      Delete
  18. Hey there, CZ, are we any closer? Is Sunday still looking good? I had a lovely time on my birthday, after initially fending off some classic N-moves from the extended family ("You're such a ninja!" my daughter said)..my daughter, almost 18, went with me to a concert that my friends, a world music band, gave at a historic theatre..there was dancing, it was great. My daughter had never been out to a an event like that at a club before. She was the best date I could possibly have had! We had a good time. I felt like my priorities in order, and isn't that excellent, having fun while your priorities are in order?

    Hope we're all back again soon,

    Writethinkspeak

    P.S. CZ, the content here has really helped shape my personal statement for the PhD programs I'm applying to...thank you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. Hi WTS, Ninja Master Extraordinarie!

      The forum is kinda open and kinda not open right now if you want to check in. We may be shutting it down sporadically while my son re-installs the things we lost during this mess. But you are welcome to use the forum 'as is' if you promise not to freak out if it goes into Maintenance Mode without warning.

      We don't have the results from our most recent test but everything is loading quickly so we've at least caught the worst of the creepizoids-in-cyber-space.

      A couple of members have written to say they had never read my blog and now they feel like they know me better. Is that the silver lining to a week of clouds (and yes---tears)?

      Hugs,
      CZ

      Delete

    2. Some happy news---we've passed a crucial test that suggests (crossing fingers) we've good to go!

      We will be working on the site tomorrow (Sunday, October 14th) and you may get booted off the site if you're logged-in. So service will be sporadic....

      This has been awful, hasn't it?!

      Hugs all,
      CZ

      Delete

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