December 24, 2008

The Narcissistic Grinch

Sometimes the only way to deal with a Holiday Hooligan is to laugh; to eat lots of chocolate; to shop 'til we drop; to spike the eggnog; to gamble in Las Vegas; to self-destruct in countless ways---including the most vicious behavior of all: writing poetry and letting other folks read it.

If you're facing a mismatch between the Dream Holiday and the Real Holiday waking you up at night, I hope this little ditty offers some relief.

I wrote it a few years ago after my worst-Christmas-ever; but it still makes me smile today. I hope you're smiling, too.

The Narcissistic Grinch

Never give an inch to the Narcissistic Grinch
The one who hopes to steal our Christmas joyous!
Whether he knows it or not, he cannot have what we've got
so the best that he can do is to annoy us.

Never even flinch when the Narcissistic Grinch
triggers your response to his false keenness.
He hopes to spoil it all, since he does not have the balls
to stop projecting all his spite and meanness.

And if the nasty Grinch is a narcissistic wench
with greedy fingers wrapped around your riches...
Let her know right quick, that you are no Saintly Nick
and your brains are in your head and not your britches.

So never give an inch to the Narcissistic Grinch
Begrudging what he gets and what he's giving
The price you'll have to pay on this special holiday
will cost the very spirit out of living.

If the GriNchie bears a gift and you catch a certain whiff
Of moldy smells enmeshed with one another...
It is relatively sure (some folks say there is no cure)
He'll be gifting you with fruitcake from his mother.

Wishing all of you a Happy Holiday!

P.S. Okay...maybe not happy the way you've imagined being happy; but a certain variety of happiness of the relatively-boring and low-anxiety definition. Why yearn for happy when sanity is perfectly 'good enough'?

Hugs all,



    This is great. I love it.

    Merry Christmas

  2. This is my first N free Christmas in 7 years. It felt so good to not be worrying when the other shoe would drop. I can't say the mess is out of my head, but at least it is out of my house.

    Great poem.

    Merry Peaceful Christmas to you also!

  3. Priceless. And yes, I'm smiling. From ear to ear.


  4. Just found your blog, will be reading more of the archive over the holidays.

    Happy New Year

  5. Hello dearest CZ and Happy New Year!

    Love the poem -- it made me smile.

    So, today, in a desperate attempt to find some sanity amidst my aged mother's histrionics, I started re-reading some of your blog. And there was E.A.R. Yup. Should have remembered that gem before I engaged in trying to get my mother to 'listen to the truth according to me' while she was busily telling me 'the truth is nobody cares. It's all my fault. My whole life I've been wrong....'

    Thanks CZ. You are truly a gem. I am blessed by your presence in my life!


  6. Thank you everyone for responding. Maybe you don't know this so let me say how comforting it is when other people laugh with us!

    Maybe people think it odd to make fun of something as serious as NPD, but for me at least, laughing breaks the spell of powerlessness and lightens the load just enough to make it through another day.

    I am so glad you're here and smiling, too.

    Hugs to all,

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  8. Dear Louise,

    It doesn't seem to matter how much information about narcissism we've poured into our heads, we still have to stop reacting to the narcissistic person's tactics. For some of us, that requires a lifetime of personal work overcoming our childhood 'training'.

    We Catch Ourselves In the Act and we do whatever we can to re-empower ourselves. I get caught up in old behavior myself which is probably why I'm still typing messages so many years after learning about NPD. It's not enough to Know the FAQs---we gotta Act with awareness not only of the N, but also of ourselves.

    I need lots of help from other people and I'm so grateful to be able to give back now-and-then!

    You are a gem in my life, too. I think you're one of the first people I met online back many years ago (2003??) very special it is to bear witness to one another's journey!

    "O, the places we'll go!"

    (a little Dr. Seuss is probably in order this morning!)



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